The Importance of Understanding Temperament
Each human being is born as a unique individual with his/her own temperament. Understanding the temperament of each child and adult in a family is key to finding out each other’s triggers and what makes one lose it! Research has now proven that many of our personality traits are the result of our genetic makeup. Temperament describes how we see the world and our natural reactions to our perceptions. For example, our levels of sensitivity, caution, intensity, activity, persistence and adaptability. We don’t choose to shiver at nails scratching a chalkboard or choose to have a high activity level, these are part of our temperament traits. Understanding each other’s temperament helps you to find ways to work together versus engaging in power struggles and temper tantrums.
The Nine Temperamental Traits
Mary Sheedy Kurcinka is the excellent author of Raising Your Spirited Child:A Guide for Parents Whose Child Is More Intense, Sensitive, Perceptive, Persistent, Energetic and the accompanying workbook, as well as Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles. (As a child and family counselor, and parent of two, I read many parenting books and place Mary Sheedy Kurcinka in my top three favourite authors!) Her books guide you through temperament charts to help you understand where on the continuum each member of your family fits for:
- Persistence
- Sensitivity
- Adaptability
- Intensity
- Regularity/Rhythmicity
- Activity level
- First reaction
- Mood
- Perceptiveness
It’s eye-opening to read the questions and realize that this is why each of us reacts the way we do. Once you understand your child’s temperament and accept that this is the way he/she was born and these are temperament traits that have been acquired, you can interact with him/her more easily.
Temperament is a key individual factor in the development of resilience (as mentioned in my article Raising Resilient Children & Youth). An easy-going temperament is a protective factor that affects the resilience of children and youth. A child’s inborn temperament will be evident within the first year of life, but can continue to be affected by a warm, caring and understanding environment.
Supporting Your Child’s Temperament
Caring adults can help to guide children and youth with their temperaments. For example, avoiding excessive stimulation for a sensitive child, helping highly active individuals channel their energy, teaching self-soothing and calming strategies to intense young people, asking persistent kids what their plans are and giving them the opportunity to finish a task, keeping predictable mealtimes and bedtimes for children who need regularity, giving a cautious first reaction individual time to warm-up and teaching the quick-to-adapt child to “look before you leap”. Supporting your child’s temperament, helping other family members and teachers to understand his/her temperament, and teaching your child about his/her temperament will all influence the development of resilience.
If this information could be useful for a friend or family member, please forward this article. If you would like a specific topic to be covered in Mama Compass, I would love to hear from you via my contact page .
Warmly,
Sharon
Trackbacks/Pingbacks
[...] intensity. They tend to be more passionate, enthusiastic and emotional. As discussed earlier, temperament is a result of Mother Nature. One can support a child with his/her temperament and have some [...]
[...] How does one determine if a child has a medical issue or a spirited temperament? [...]
[...] your child is on the high end for the temperament trait of persistence, remember that temperament is part of our genetic make-up. Focus on the [...]
[...] just as children come in all shapes and sizes so do their attention cups! Depending on their temperament, and place in the family, each child’s attention needs will be unique. Next week I’ll [...]